There goes my back. GROSS
The deboned heroes (Doki, Xillali, and Derek) are lying helpless, prone on the floor.
Doki knows the following about Orcus. He is special among the demons. He carries a shard that is a key to another realm. He is the god oif the undead, that hates all life. He hates the Raven Queen for taking over the realm of death. He is rumored to have created the first vampires. General badass motherfuckler, who has recently been raging war against The Fey.
“Who are you that are not the flesh of my master” says the monster
Erdan engages. Orcus insinuaqtes then that he must then know the price. Erdan tries to sweet Orcus, lying through his teeth. Erdan offers to help Orcus kill the interlopers.
Orcus accepts his offer “Bring me the blood of the Unseelei and we’ll talk again.”
The Naga curls its tail and stares. I don’t think we’re getting our spines back. Nagas are immortal, the cannot be killed. If defeated, they just reform.
Doki tries to appease to the Naga, asking it to help. The Naga creepily whispers “No” in her ear and slithers away.
Demetri picks up the spineless heroes and tries to wrap them around his arm but he realizes he should actually cradle them like baby kittens as it is painful for them to bend their jelly bodies like that.
They move into the hallway. They hear the vampires whispering in their strange vampire language, saying “Come to us, comeee, you need help don’t you? Comeee”. Erdan goes towards them, much to the dismay of Dimitri.
Demetri dons living bone armor that deflects critical hits. It conforms to his body like a sexy dragon corset. The jelly heroes rest for an hour to regrow their spines while Naora stays watch .
Erdan walks in the vampire’s den, and sees their bodies have been absorbed intoi the flesh of the living wall. They have cloudy eyes. When Erdan walks into the room, they start to giggle and are quite mad. Erdan tries to make friends with them, even though they’re just babbling gibberish and rhymes.
“No flesh nor feather nor scales nor bones, but they have fingers and thumbs of their own.”
Erdan realizes it is a riddle and asks them the Sphinx’s riddle, in return. The vampires are amused and stumped by this riddle. He trades them a hint for a hint.
All three resting heroes regain their spine through magic, and through the ambient energy in their location. Xillali uses THE compass, its arrow points straight. The party goes to find Erdan. Doki counter charms when she’s around the corner. The vampires slither “More prey, We mean visitors.
Erdan makes a bad pun. Demetri arrogantly demands to know what the riddle is. He guesses the answer is “A Glove”. He solves the puzzle easily since he has been blessed by the Sphinx, and egotistically states “Master of Riddles!!”. Demetri’s demand for information about the Unseelei. The vampires creepily stall, and giggle to themselves. Eventually they state:
“The Unseelei were here, they left traps. They left guardians to look over sleeping fairies. But if I were you I would leave them alone, because those fairies are the bad kind.”
Doki asks “Why are the Fairies bad”. To which the vampires respond “What do you value the most?” implying that the Fairies steal memories.
The vampires ask her another riddle. “He who builds me doesn’t want me, he who buys me doesn’t need me, he who uses me doesn’t care.”
Doki answers: “A coffin.”, so she is now allowed to ask the vampires a question. She asks how she can grow back her arm. The vampires state that the only way is buying gaining a wish. To do so they must either go to the black tower guarded by Orcus or the white tower guarded by Nero.
The vampires stop giggling. The one in the center looks at Xillali, as if his sockets can still see her. He asks why she want to visit the heart, only death is there. Xillali give sass stating that it is unfair to be asked more questions and not be given answers. The vampires tell her “to make friends”. The room poops them out as the vampires giggle maniacally.
Xillali takes out her compass again, it points towards where the screaming came from. They walk in that direction. Doki’s counter charm has worn off. They see a little side area, there is a gollum like creature with bite marks all over his body, he has no name, hereafter referred to as NoName. He is held to the wall with living tendrils.
Doki tries to set fire to the tendrils but it only tightens the hold on NoName. NoName screams obscenities at them and begs to be set free. Doki tries to make friends. NoName responds with gibberish. Naora and Demetri hack two of the tendrils. Derek hacks the last of the tendrils and NoName scurries off.
NoName runs past the knight room and into a room with a dining room set. The party chases after him. Erdan runs into the knight room. A red knight starts to attack Erdan. It multiples so there are now three red knights chasing him. The blue and green knights are standing still in the back, watching. The party is now separated. Erdan starts running away towards NoName, with the knights hot on his heels. He cowers down behind the table and casts an illusion of a trap in the doorway.
Doki shakes her furry head in exasperation. Xillali is scared and can’t do anything. Erdan yells for the party to close the stone door once he is through. A red knight moves towards Demetri and attacks. A second knight moves towards Demetri and attacks. Demetri takes damage from both attacks., The third knight interacts with Erdan’s trap and realizes it’s an illusion. Erdan yells for his party to turn the dial. The doors close and the knights are trapped inside. NoName runs out into a cave, and Erdan chases after it. There is a giant bat on the ceiling. NoName covers itself in bat guano. Erdan casts a suggestion spell and tells NoName to follow him. NoName angrily complies.
The party meets up. Xillali asks NoName if she can heal him. NoName takes bat guano and rubs it on her face. She takes this as a “Yes” and heals NoName. They figure out that NoName is a goblin. Doki sings NoName a bawdy goblin song. Erdan tries to sweet talk NoName to draw more information. They find out the vampires have been biting NoName, but NoName has no memory of how he got to ShadowFell. NoName tells them that the knights have something to do with the heart, but he doesn’t know what.
There are a lot of vampires here because they are attracted to the heart, it is sentient. When they make their way to the heart, either 1 of 2 things happen. Either they are found worthy and become part of Shadowfell or they die instantly. Erdan lowers his suggestion spell, at which point NoName punches him and runs away.